Out with the old, in with new money-making ideas


Much of a child’s education occurs outside the classroom. Take the frequent fundraisers… please.

For some reason, band programs were the most notorious for fundraising projects when I was in school. We sold candy bars and magazine subscriptions among other things, and the school’s band program, in turn, got the profit.

Those of us gullible enough to take this fundraising seriously sold as much as we could for an opportunity to win an overvalued prize.

Don’t get me wrong. Selling candy bars, popcorn or magazine subscriptions is not necessarily a bad thing. For one thing, it reminded many of us that an education is important, because not everyone has what it takes to make a living in sales.

For another, you learned to appreciate your parents more, because they were willing to buy overpriced products for umpteen years to support your education.

Now that I’m older and, dare I say, somewhat wiser, I realize that fundraising is a necessary part of supporting schools’ strapped budgets.

Today, fundraising has moved well beyond activities by students and their parents’ institutional endeavors—either product marketing or sale of sponsorships.

So, here are a few fundraising ideas for our local schools and Tabor College. Call it my gift to the community. I’ll let the experts decide which suggestions are more likely to work, which may be tacky and which suggestions would raise the most money. The real dilemma is what to do if a tacky idea has the best potential to raise the most money.

• Don’t allow people to bring seat cushions/stadium seats to the game. Rather, let them rent stadium seats at home games.

• T-shirts have potential. In Wichita, for example, I’ve seen shirts that read, “WSU football — Unbeaten since 1986.” For the uninformed, that’s the last year the Shockers played football.

Tabor could sell shirts that say, “Winning isn’t everything” on the front, and “Tabor College football — Building character for 40 years,” on the back.

• Tabor could expand the naming opportunities in the new stadium. Right now we have Joel H. Wiens Stadium and Reimer Field. Ask area optometrists to make a donation for the right to name the scoreboard; an aluminum siding company to name the bleachers; a convenience store to name the concession stand; a business that sells artificial trees to name the artificial turf; a local eating establishment to name the parking lot that’s suitable for tailgating; and a newspaper to name the press box.

Of course, it might be a bit much for radio announcers and public address announcers to say, “Good afternoon and welcome to Joel H. Wiens Stadium, home of Reimer Field, the Paul Unruh Scoreboard, the Wiens Construction bleachers, Casey’s concession stand, Hillsboro Hardware turf, Subway parking lot and the Hillsboro Free Press press box.”

• In light of legal challenges that USD 410 and Tabor had to overcome before building the new football stadium, perhaps they should ask Nancy’s clothing store to sell T-shirts that read “Suits — half off.”

• Tabor football cards with pictures and names of players from 1970 to the present. The object is to see how many players you can sort into the correct piles—those who attended one year, two years, three years and those who graduated. Guess which pile will be the smallest?

• Given the number of homes in Hillsboro that display flags of universities such as Kansas State and Nebraska, ask local residents to buy and proudly display HHS and Tabor College flags.

*?*?*

Miscellaneous rumblings:

• What do you call 11 millionaires standing around watching a football game?

The Kansas City Chiefs.

• When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.


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