Lost joke suddenly


I had a joke I wanted to include in my column for some time, but I couldn’t remember it. That drives me crazy, and almost every waking moment it’s in the back of my mind.

Then recently, when I was going to lie down after lunch, I saw the new pillow on the love seat that has a parrot on it.

This guy owns a parrot that can speak quite well. One day the parrot owner’s preacher stopped by for a visit and all the parrot would do was cuss a blue streak.

Embarrassed, the owner grabs the bird and throws it in the freezer. When his minister leaves, the man pulls out the parrot and places it back on its perch.

After a bit, the shivering parrot says to its owner: “What ever did that chicken do that was so bad?”

I saw something the other day I didn’t know even existed.

I looked for my cell phone at work the other afternoon and it wasn’t there. I called Nancy on our regular line to call it to see if I had left it at home. No luck there or here.

Then I decided to go to my truck in the parking lot, even though it was a very hot day. There it was on the front seat in the sun.

When I picked it up to let Nancy know I had found it, the phone had a picture of a thermometer with a big red vertical line on it. The message read: “Temperature Warning,” including a notice something like you can’t use your phone until it cools down.

In about 20 minutes it was cool enough to use.

I’m glad Apple is looking out for me at no charge on that item.

I am going to have to buy another pair of sunglasses or two to deal with a constant problem I am having.

If I’m in the car, the sunglasses are in the house; if I’m in my truck, the sunglasses are in the car; if I’m in the house, the sunglasses are in a vehicle. Quite baffling.

The other night, when the electricity was off for hours on end, we ended up sitting on the porch to take in the lightning, thunder and falling rain.

It’s a pleasant sound, even better than fireworks for me and environmentally safe.

Since Dan likes Kansas thunderstorms, I was going to try to capture the sights and sounds and send it to him. All I seemed to get on the screen was a firefly or two moving across the screen. My timing was never fast enough to get the lightning when it was doing its thing.

Hats off to the Free Press staff for putting together the programs for the Hills­boro/Marion high school alumni football game.

I’m glad we have been doing the graduation sections and yearbooks all these years so we had the senior photos of most of the players on file.

If you wish to share your comments or ideas, my e-mail address is joel@

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