Blame the meds for my error

Last week I made the biggest mistake of my humble writing career by stating that postage had gone up 3 cents for both first-class mail and for post cards. That actually did happen at the previous increase, but not this time.

I have no idea where I got that. I must have been on narcotics. Wait. I was on narcotics when I wrote that, and with my left hand and without my brain.

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I should explain my reference to narcotics. I recently had my right shoulder surgically repaired for rotator-cuff damage and bone spurs. Thus the need for the narcotics.

I don?t know about you, but I?m not a big fan of pain medications. They all make me ill and feel lousy.

Luckily for me, within four days I was off of them. There is both good and bad with that in that I haven?t had a full night?s sleep since I quit taking them. Actually, I didn?t sleep all night with them either.

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Using my left hand to eat instead of my right has proved to be the most difficult challenge thus far. The worst has been eating peas and corn with a fork, which I don?t know how to do well.

There are a few other things that are quite difficult as well, but I won?t get into that here.

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I was looking in my backpack last week for a jump drive I couldn?t find. It was the backpack I used when I flew to Bend, Ore., last month to see Dan and Katie.

I was surprised to find a 3/4-inch wood chisel that had made it through security three times on that trip. Why it was in there in the first place I have no idea. I guess it fits in with the TSA failing to find objects 95 percent of the time.

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The patient told the doctor that it hurt when he lifted his arm above his head. The doctor said, ?Don?t do that.

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I mentioned that a big obstacle is trying to type with my left hand. I didn?t realize how right-handed I really am. I wrote most of this column by using Siri on my phone to email these morsels of nonsense to myself. Then cut and paste.

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One more thing about the surgery. If I thought I was going to die soon, I would not have done it. But since I think I?ll be around for a while, I need my arm to do things around the house.

My left arm is acting up a bit up a little bit too now, so I at least need one good arm.

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I was told on my follow-up visit that I can?t drive a vehicle until July 14?a total of six weeks. And I will be in a sling for six weeks, too. I think I know what I will be doing this summer.

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I am liking DirecTV more and more. If you miss a showing and forgot to record it, you have three days to watch it on demand. There are tons of shows available on demand, including past TV series and the like.

Plus you can record up to five shows at a time.

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If you wish to share your comments or ideas, my e-mail address is joel@
hillsborofreepress.com.

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