Category: Opinion

Directions still off by a quarter
Directions still off by a quarter

Directions still off by a quarter

I?ve lived in Hillsboro for two-thirds of my life, and I still must not know my directions.

Mot Ttelp pulled me aside and said he had also played in the old Tabor College barn, but corrected me on where I located it in last week?s column. It was actually south across the old highway, and not west of the college.

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Why Vietnam is vacation location

So why am I in Vietnam for a three-week vacation? I was there two years ago and had a fantastic time. Forty years ago I was there and had an interesting time. But how do I justify or rationalize this third trip?

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Hair experiment was a close shave

If there?s anything that you want to avoid under any circumstances, it?s making a satirical remark about how long it has been since your girlfriend last shaved her legs.

I learned this the hard way.

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Pork N Beings (Week of March 12, 2008)
Pork N Beings (Week of March 12, 2008)

Pork N Beings (Week of March 12, 2008)

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Wild weather

We didn?t realize the magnitude of how challenging the year 2007 was for weather in Kansas until we reviewed the report from the National Weather Service in preparation for ?Severe Weather Awareness Week.? Not only did the state set a new record for tornadoes in a year?137, surpassing the previous record of 135 set two years earlier?but an array of […]

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Letters (Week of March 12, 2008)

Daylight Saving Time is the real WMD   I used to think Americans had become a laughingstock to the rest of the world because of Daylight Saving Time: ?We save daylight by changing our clocks.? I didn?t understand, and neither did they, that cutting off the bottom of a sheet and sewing it onto the top actually does not make […]

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New candidate proclaims platform

It?s official: I?m once again declaring myself a write-in candidate for president of the United States. No, I?m not planning to campaign at all on the Republican or Democratic platform. I am an Independent in the truest sense of the word.

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To-do list taken to a whole new level

?You have been my friend. That in itself is a tremendous thing. I wove my webs for you because I liked you. After all, what?s a life, anyway? We?re born, we live a little while, we die. A spider?s life can?t help being something of a mess with all this trapping and eating flies. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle. Heaven knows anyone?s life can stand a little of that.? ?Charlotte in ?Charlotte?s Web?

I?m more likely to cuss and smash a spider than quote it, but had to make the exception with Charlotte. I think it?s my age that makes me appreciate what she?s saying, which, while (I hope) isn?t necessarily old by definition, does give me access to one of the true benefits of getting older?stupidity.

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Shaving in the shower has pros, cons

I?ve been shaving for more than 40 years now and I?ve never shaved in the shower until last week.

The cord was barely long enough.

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