Category: Don’t Ask Why

Some good news to fill your glass

The evening news didn?t win any awards by covering a joyous event. A charity never reached its goal by saying how great things were. A reporter never made the front page by writing about a cupcake contest. I know I?m not necessarily always a half-glass-full kind of guy, but I don?t prescribe to the glass-half-empty thinking either. I?m just happy […]

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Lunchroom politics hard to digest

I don?t like to get involved in the subject of politics. It?s impossible to discuss it rationally. Take the issue of inflation: A person starts out expressing his feelings about the unusually high number of pre-popped balloons they had raining down at the end of the Republican convention and a few minutes later he ends up calling his friend an […]

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This cat is graceful but never agile

I enjoy reading magazines like National Geographic and Popular Science because it makes me feel?however fleeting the sensation may be?just a little more intelligent. Articles about deep space exploration, mass digital data creation, the fate of the Dragon Blood Tree or explicit directions to build my own robot from scratch using the utensils in my kitchen deeply interest me. The […]

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For Sight was a predictable choice

The NFL?s preseason began last week, and football has been on my mind ever since. I usually don?t find myself terribly attached to a certain team, but for the sport of it, I like to pick one to root for throughout the season. But the pickings are starting to get slim. I?ve been for this team and for that team, […]

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Olympics gives us reason to smile

always look forward to the Olympic Games. In these times so full of violence, hate, scandal, political corruption and really, really stupid children?s cartoons, it?s refreshing to see the world?s countries come together in brotherhood to participate in one of man?s most epic events, smiling warmly at each other while secretly harboring a complete and utter loathing for those other […]

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Can?t brag about Agri-knowledge

I recently recalled a moment that changed my life forever. And that moment was shortly preceded by a sound. And that sound is spelled something like ?phud.? I was 6 years old and spending the day at the rural home of one of my farm friends. Late in the afternoon we heard there was a new baby cow at my […]

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Columnist spills secrets for success

I?ve been writing this column thing for more than 10 years now, and it occurred to me that I?ve never explained how the process works. And that just doesn?t seem fair. Secret recipes, it seems, are a popular way for certain entities to sound mysterious and highly successful, when in fact they simply don?t want to share. Kentucky Fried Chicken […]

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Losing my iMind in digital reality

I?m losing touch with reality. Not in the psychological sense in which I might find myself helping the Pentagon crack encrypted enemy tele?communication or facing off against Batman while wearing awful clown makeup and a greasy green wig. No, it?s much more serious than that: I?m losing touch with the world because I?m being sucked into the world of digital […]

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Time has come to expand family

There comes a time for every young couple when?after being ?just us? for a time?they find that something in their lives is missing. It?s a need for greater responsibility. A call to reach beyond themselves. A desire to nourish and protect. And so, like countless other couples before us, we answered the call and got a cat. (What did you […]

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10 years later, this column lives on

In spring 2002, a 12-year-old walked into his hometown newspaper office, dropped a portfolio of writing samples on the editor?s desk and told the editor that he wanted to write a column. I?m still not sure why, but the editor said yes, and 10 years ago?on May 22?the Hillsboro Free Press printed the first installment of this column. It was […]

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