Articles By: David Vogel

Pumpkin spice latte is ?hot??

If anyone ever comes up to me and says that Ameri?cans are basically a giant herd of stupid sheep who clumsily but enthusiastically move as one mass from one craze to the next, I?d smack their face, stomp on their toe and say, ?OK, yeah, you?re right.? I?m talking about the pumpkin spice latte, the annual autumnal tradition that combines […]

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FYI: Acronyms are sort of OK

I would like to take a moment to briefly discuss the preoccupation with acronyms that we have in this country (aka the USA). The other day I was watching a program in which a British lad said something about the ?telly.? The use of the word telly got me thinking: Why do we initialize TV instead of simply shortening the […]

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Cat cites silly Human tricks

This is Simba Vogel. Maybe you know my Human. He?s the round-headed guy who likes to antagonize his single reader from Minnesota by making fun of that state. Anyway, my Human can?t come to the computer today because he?s off somewhere doing things that stress me out. So I guess I?m in charge of his column this week. Just think […]

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One big move deserves another

To paraphrase M*A*S*H’s Henry Blake when his office was surreptitiously emptied, I’m writing to you from deep inside a real big empty. My home office?which was once filled with the books and posters and trinkets that I imagine would be for sale if my personality ever had a garage sale?has basically been whittled down to a desk, a chair and […]

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Path to Dreamland often is elusive

I can?t sleep. This might have something to do with the fact that my pre-bedtime activities consisted of watching ?Indiana Jones and the Temple of Lots of Snakes? and eating a fuzzy navel-flavored snow cone. Snakes and sugar are rarely the winning elixir for nighttime revitalization. That?s one possibility, but the more likely culprit is the fact that every few […]

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Time travels slowly in west Kansas

Last week I had the opportunity to attend a church conference in Colorado Springs, which seemed like a great idea until I found myself traveling all alone down I-70 on the great expanse of nothingness that ill-fated cartographers labeled as western Kansas shortly before their deaths. They died of boredom, of course, because there is absolutely nothing else out there […]

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Communicate so it won?t humiliate

As a communication major in college, I spent a significant amount of time studying the communication theories that other communication theorists had developed in the past, because apparently there isn?t much else you can do with a communication major. Communication theory, I should explain, is a field of study that attempts to understand and define how good we can talk […]

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Bells of technology toll for thee

A realization came to me the other day like a bell going off. Three bells actually. My phone dinged to tell me I had a new text message, my tablet dinged to tell me I had a new email in my inbox and my computer dinged to tell me I had a new Facebook notification. I?d say this all happened […]

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Fireworks tradition was lit in 1776

This week we celebrate that fateful day in 1776 when the Founding Fathers, who were then just Founding Teenagers, were goofing off with firecrackers in the alleyway behind Independence Hall and accidentally launched one off into the British?s shrubbery, catching it on fire. This really ticked the British off. So they marched their army over?on the wrong side the road, […]

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Odds, ends from David?s idea trunk

With just a few hours left before summer officially begins, I decided it was time for my first (and probably last) annual spring cleaning column, which will basically demonstrate that I really can throw out an awful lot of bad column ideas and still have enough… *** For the longest time I kept thinking that Mel Brooks and Mel Gibson […]

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