PARTLY NONSENSE

ORIGINALLY WRITTEN JOEL KLAASSEN
As usual, all it took was the Marion County Fair to make it rain. It even rained on the previous week when the fair used to be held.

The price of gas is getting outrageous. Makes shopping at home with your friends and neighbors even more appealing.

A week ago Sunday, my left ear plugged up and stayed that way all week. I kept thinking it would open at some point, but it didn’t.

I had already passed my three-day rule and then my five-day rule-which is, if it isn’t better by now go to the doctor.

Turns out it was a simple matter of cleaning out the wax build-up in my ears. To think it took almost 60 years to plug them up it wasn’t too bad.

I couldn’t believe how much wax can be in there. They needed a wheel barrow to haul it all away.

Now the television doesn’t need to be so loud and the water running in the shower is really loud.

Plus, no more excuses that I didn’t hear what the wife said.

For the future care of my ears, I thought I would get a turkey baster. Then we’d have more than one use for it.

While in Seattle, we went to Archie McPhees showroom in the Ballard neighborhood. Archie McPhees is a nationally known store for gags and the unusual.

I came away with bacon-strip bandages for the office, a toothpick-bird for home and a periscope for looking around the corner. The meat shower curtain was cool, but we don’t need a shower curtain because we have a door.

Hillsboro Community Medical Center’s new entrance is starting to take shape and you can see it all the way from downtown.

I’m hoping that I’ll only use it as a visitor, but you never know.

This guy was told he had a banana in his ear. His reply: “I can’t hear you. I have a banana in my ear.”

To combat the high price of gasoline, I was thinking trains could become ferries for cars. For example, on football game days, hundreds of cars could be hauled to Manhattan or Lawrence with designated stops along the way. It might even be safer and surely less expensive. No wear and tear on the vehicle.

It’s already done with truck trailers.

Hard to believe that school begins this week. The summer flew by like a comet. We have to remind ourselves that more children will be on the streets, many who are riding bikes to school for the first time.

Drive slowly and keep a watchful eye.

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