PARTLY NONSENSE

ORIGINALLY WRITTEN JOEL KLAASSEN
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef but the wrod as a wlohe.

— I had the privilege of having my teeth cleaned this past week. They are really much cleaner than they were before. With all of the scraping, picking, sandblasting, etc., how could they not be clean?

I wonder if dental hygenists use toothpicks to clean the knobs on their kitchen stoves and other household appliances.

Just for fun I quit shaving to see what would come out at this age. I haven’t had any facial hair for nearly 20 years. Now that I haven’t shaved it off for a few weeks, I am noticing all of the many guys who have mustaches, goatees and full beards. Seems like a big percentage of men now days have something growing on their faces.

Another thought I had about a beard: If the hair is dark enough on your face, your teeth will look whiter.

Some dear friends of ours who used to live in Hillsboro and were back for the Arts and Crafts Fair said, “Where’s the stoplight?” One said she would buy it if it were for sale and would pay at least 20 bucks for it.

— Now that the stoplight is gone I haven’t missed it one bit. And there hasn’t been a rash of accidents like some said there would be if it were removed.

And think about all of the time that has been saved not having to wait for the silly light to turn green. Plus, when the sun is in your eyes, you don’t have to strain to see what color is showing.

— A termite walks into the tavern and asked, “Is the bar tender here?”

— When son Dan was little he had never seen me without a mustache until one day I shaved it off and went into his room.

He took one look and screamed because he wasn’t sure who I was, I guess.

— Speaking of Dan, we are planning to see him in Seattle soon. Can’t wait to eat some tasty clam chowder and salmon while we’re there. I had some clam chowder about every meal the first time we visited him there.

We plan to see the Pacific Ocean and do some sailing on the Puget Sound without trying to think about the fact that the water there is 600 feet deep.

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