Written by Joe Kleinsasser Tuesday, 09 June 2009 15:01
Summer will be over before you know it and it will be time for Tabor’s and Hillsboro’s new football stadium to open. But, let’s slow down, relax and ponder a plethora of sports trivia.
n Is it an oxymoron to say the Kansas City Royals have an all-time single-season home run leader when the record is only 36? Do you mean to tell me the Royals never had a player hit more than 36 in a season during the steroid era? Does that mean they weren’t cheating or trying very hard?
n If you call yourself a Royals fan, take this three-minute challenge. Name the top-10 single-season home run leaders. I’m embarrassed to admit that I could only name three. Answer later.
n Here are some unusual promotional nights scheduled by Major League Baseball teams this year, courtesy of ESPN.com:
Lawyer Appreciation Night (Florida Marlins, May 22). How desperate are the Marlins for fans, putting on a Lawyer Appreciation Night? What’s next, Certified Public Accountant Appreciation Night? (Well, actually, yes; that’s scheduled for June 9.)
Kids’ Pillowcases (Padres, April 12). The perfect gift for all the young Padres fans crying themselves to sleep this summer.
Calculator Day (Yankees, Aug. 29). Don’t worry. It’s an extra-large screen that reads out to 15 digits. So you can calculate how much you spent on your tickets to get into the stadium.
n Much has been made about home runs flying out of the new Yankee Stadium like taxpayer bailout money for bonuses to high-paid executives. But here is an interesting headline crawl from sportspickle.com: Yankee Stadium to Shoot Off Fireworks for Non-Home Runs.
n Tell me again why recent “gotcha” books on A-Rod and Roger Clemens garnered so much attention. Wouldn’t it be bigger news if someone wrote a book about players who are clean?
n Earlier this season, two members of the Washington Nationals took to the field without noticing their team name was misspelled on their jerseys. Apparently, it took them until the third inning to realize they were experiencing their own version of a wardrobe malfunction.
This typo didn’t result in anything more than a little embarrassment. The manufacturer probably wouldn’t fare too well in a spelling bee.
n Here’s some fun stuff courtesy of Jayson Stark on ESPN.com....
From lovable Phillies pudgeball Matt Stairs, after the Manny Ramirez news broke, on why all that work in the gym is clearly overrated: “People are going to have to stop taking all this health stuff and get back to being chubby and having fun. It’s too much work being in shape.”
Seen in the Chicago parody publication, The Heckler: Pittsburgh Pirates taken hostage by Somali pirates.
Here are some funny baseball quotes from Aron Wallad: “Let no one accuse baseball of not being tough on drugs. During his baseball career, Steve Howe was given seven lifetime suspensions” (Bill Ferraro, baseball fan).
“The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing” (Dizzy Dean).
“I managed a team that was so bad we considered a 2-0 count on the batter a rally” (Rich Donnelly, minor league manager).
n Answer to Kansas City Royals single-season home run leaders trivia question from No. 1-10: Steve Balboni, Gary Gaetti, John Mayberry, Dean Palmer, Danny Tartabull, Jermaine Dye, Bo Jackson, Danny Tartabull again, George Brett and Chili Davis.
Suffice it to say the Royals history has a significant power outage. Nothing says trivial quite like Kansas City home run leaders.