Slick mocks annual NFL draft wisdom

Written by Hillsboro Free Press Tuesday, 08 May 2012 15:12

If you listen to sports radio talk shows in April, you hear pundits pontificating on which players should be drafted first in the NFL. Naturally, my agent I.M. Slick has some opinions on the topic as well, and he’s not the least bit bashful about sharing them.

Slick: I want you to ditch your underpaid sports writing gig and become an NFL scout.

Joe: Well, that’s an interesting idea. But what makes you think I’m qualified to be an NFL scout?

Slick: What makes you think you’re qualified to be a sports columnist?

Joe: Now wait just a minute.

Slick: It doesn’t matter if you’re qualified to be a scout. Have you paid any attention to the annual NFL meat market, er draft?”

Joe: A little. It’s always interesting to see who...

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Coaches’ stare best weapon in varied arsenal

Written by Joe Kleinsasser Tuesday, 24 April 2012 15:57

Coaches hate losing. Often during games, a coach can show utter disgust at a lack of effort or a loss of focus.

While much has been said about coaches who berate players in practice, during games or in the locker room, there is another tactic that may be even more difficult for players to handle.

Call it the stare.

Players will do almost anything to avoid the stare because there is some truth to the saying that looks can kill.

One wonders if former K-State basketball coach Frank Martin can stare through a wall. The stare is a staple of his sideline demeanor.

Jamar Samuels, one of his student-athletes, was quoted as saying, “You have to treat it a lot like the sun. Looking at it for more than a few seconds is dangerous to your...

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It’s time to get off the ol’ duff

Written by Joe Kleinsasser Tuesday, 10 April 2012 15:16

The not-so-harsh winter is over and so are the lame excuses. Research says it. Statistics back it up. You know it’s true. I know it’s true. Getting some exercise is good for us. All that’s left is to get off the ol’ duff and exercise.

It’s not my nature to tell others what to do, so I won’t tell you to get some exercise. However, I will strongly encourage you to consider it.

Notice, I didn’t say run a marathon. I didn’t say run 10 wind sprints. I didn’t even say run. Just do something.

Walk the dog. Ride a bike. Lift a few weights. Do something.

If you live in Hillsboro and have an urge to drink a chocolate shake, at least take a walk to Sonic or Wendy’s, whichever is farther away, to get it.

And I’m not just...

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Bracketology an unnatural sports science

Written by Joe Kleinsasser Tuesday, 27 March 2012 14:52

Imagine attending a family gathering and someone asks what you do for a living. You hand them a business card that reads “Bracketologist.”

Until maybe 15 years ago, people would have looked at you and said, “Huh?”

ESPN’s Joe Lunardi is considered the inventor of the term bracketology, which is the process of predicting the field of the NCAA Basketball Tourna­ment.

According to Wikipedia, bracketology incorporated some method of predicting what the NCAA Selection Committee will use as its Ratings Percentage Index in order to determine at-large non-conference-winning teams to complete the field of now 68 teams, and to seed the field by ranking all teams from 1 through 68.

Lunardi started as the owner and editor of the Blue...

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