Written by Bob Woelk Wednesday, 14 November 2007 08:37If you have some time to kill and want to kill it in the most unproductive way possible, take a trip to www.phobialist.com. There you will find a huge assortment of things to be afraid of.
I discovered that, despite this Web site containing the most comprehensive list of fears I have ever seen, there are others that were left out. Believe it or not, there is no word for a fear of long lists.
Here are some others you won’t find anywhere but here:
Fear of having to write a regular newspaper column for the local paper: vogelophobia.
Fear of the University of Kansas beating Kansas State in football on a regular basis: nonflukeophobia.
Fear of K-State beating KU in basketball this year: phatchanzophobia.
Fear of the smell remaining in your clothes after leaving a store: alcophobia.
Fear of everyone in the lunch line falling down at the same time: dominophobia.
Fear of the result of eating too many refried beans: phartophobia.
Fear of paying full price for a grocery item only to find out it was on sale across town: vogtodaleaphobia.
Fear of sending an e-mail and then discovering you forwarded it to everyone on your list or sending an e-mail you didn’t mean to: pcfauxpasphobia.
Fear of wrestling singlets: spandexophobia.
Fear of professional wrestlers: fakeophobia.
Fear of people from the West Coast: dudeophobia.
Fear of people from the East Coast: liberaphobia.
Fear of people from Kansas: ozzophobia.
Fear of country music: hickophobia.
Fear of rap music: thumpthumpthumpophobia.
Fear of classical music: snorophobia.
Fear of Top 40 music: aguilariaphobia.
Some as-of-yet-unnamed phobias are specific only to certain areas. For example, Wichita residents who are afraid of being overtaxed might suffer from arenaphobia.
Or, after hearing the new baseball team in town will be called the Wichita Wingnuts, residents of the River City might begin to suffer from the fear of being laughingstocks, or yougottabekiddingophobia.
Kansans as a group are likely to suffer from self-esteemophobia, a fear of telling anyone what state they are from.
Hillsboro teens often succumb to the fear of not finding anything to do in town, onehorseophobia.
Then, there’s the fear of having to tell your friends you are returning to town to attend Tabor College after claiming in high school you would “never, ever” enroll there, eatcrowbluejayophobia.
How about a few of my favorite actual phobias?
Alektorophobia: fear of chickens.
Arachibutyrophobia: fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth.
Aulophobia: fear of flutes.
Bolshephobia: fear of Bolsheviks.
Barophobia: fear of gravity.
Cathisophobia: fear of sitting.
Chorophobia: fear of dancing.
Cometophobia: fear of comets.
Consecotaleophobia: fear of chopsticks.
Dextrophobia: fear of objects at the right side of the body.
Dutchphobia. fear of the Dutch.
Ephebiphobia: fear of teenagers.
Epistemophobia: fear of knowledge.
Francophobia: fear of France or French culture.
Geniophobia: fear of chins.
Genuphobia: fear of knees.
Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia: fear of the number 666.
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: fear of long words.
Ideophobia: fear of ideas.
Kainolophobia or kainophobia: fear of anything new, novelty.
Lachanophobia: fear of vegetables.
Levophobia: fear of things to the left side of the body.
Macrophobia: fear of long waits.
Mageirocophobia: fear of cooking.
Melophobia: fear or hatred of music.
Myxophobia: fear of slime.
Neophobia: fear of anything new.
Nomatophobia: fear of names.
Novercaphobia: fear of your step-mother.
Octophobia: fear of the figure 8.
Ouranophobia or uranophobia: fear of heaven.
Panophobia or pantophobia: fear of everything.
Peladophobia: fear of bald people.
Pentheraphobia: fear of mother-in-law.
Phronemophobia: fear of thinking.
Pogonophobia: fear of beards.
Pteronophobia: fear of being tickled by feathers.
Rhabdophobia: fear of being severely punished or beaten by a rod, or of being severely criticized. Also fear of magic.
Russophobia: fear of Russians.
Scriptophobia: fear of writing in public.
Soceraphobia: fear of parents-in-law.
Theatrophobia: fear of theaters.
Vestiphobia: fear of clothing.
Xerophobia: fear of dryness.
Zemmiphobia: fear of the great mole rat.