Don\'t Ask Why
Written by David Vogel Tuesday, 18 January 2011 16:00Novelist James Joyce once said, “A man’s errors are his portals of discovery.” I don’t know about you, but I sure have made a lot of discoveries lately.
I was thinking about this early last week while walking across campus.
Normally this is not an eventful activity, but there are two key pieces of information I have withheld from you:
Key Piece No. 1: I was wearing my TOMS Shoes.
Key Piece No. 2: It had snowed a lot.
If you don’t know, TOMS are a specific brand of espadrille footwear that are made mostly of thin canvas, from which every pair sold another is given to a child in need of shoes.
Thin canvas shoes and snow-covered sidewalks are, as you can imagine, not exactly chocolate and peanut butter.
So I discovered, as...
Written by David Vogel Tuesday, 04 January 2011 15:28Sometimes I wonder if we have the spirit of the New Year resolution all wrong. For the most part, the most popular resolutions are all about improving the way the world views me.
Some of the resolutions that immediately come to mind include lose weight, get a better and higher-paying job, quit smoking, drink less, become more organized and take a trip.
Granted, many of these squat in the genuine personal-improvement camp. But these goals likely also include the desire of other people’s favorable opinion.
Out of curiosity, I got on the Internet to see what the Top 10 2011 New Year’s Resolutions were. I was a little surprised.
In addition to many of the resolutions I just listed, this compilation for the new year also included the...
Written by David Vogel Tuesday, 28 December 2010 17:17It is said that journalism is the first draft of history. However, I’d wager that when Phil Graham, a former Washington Post publisher, set those words to print he probably had no idea about this column.
After all, I wouldn’t exactly call this any sort of high-standard reporting. The only chance I have of ever winning a Pulitzer Prize would be if all the great journalists get benched from ink poisoning while Dave Barry is involved in a serious exploding-toaster accident.
But I suppose that in one way or another, this column is “journalism” with very heavy, size-18 type quotations marks. And if journalism is history, then—as I learned in my high school history class—history exists to be learned from.
I think that all makes...
Written by David Vogel Tuesday, 14 December 2010 15:00NORTH POLE—The eyes of the world turned to the North Pole last week as it hosted the first government election since it was founded hundreds of years ago.
The most notable candidate running for office was Santa Claus, who was vying for president of the North Pole at-large.
This was likely due to the hefty quantity of cookies and milk he consumes each year.
But despite the new title, Nicholas has always been in charge of the North Pole unofficially.
Tannen Baum, a spokeself for the North Pole’s publicity branch, said that until recent years it seemed that the North Pole didn’t need an official government structure or officials, and never would.
“We’ve always been a bit archaic,” Baum said. “For decades we operated under...
Written by David Vogel Tuesday, 30 November 2010 16:39Last year I vowed to never go shopping at 4 a.m. on Black Friday ever again. And this year I managed to stick to my word.
Instead, I left at 2:30.
For the uninitiated (read: intelligent) Black Friday is an unofficial holiday that takes place mere hours after the turkey leftovers have been put in the fridge and the Detroit Lions players have all gone home to put on their pajamas.
In the wee hours of the morning, harried shoppers with bloodshot eyes and bed head stand in lines outside of large retailers in hopes of acquiring at least one of the state-of-the-art, brand-new, never-been-in-contact-with-terrestrial-air iGadgets, of which that store has maybe five actually in stock despite heavy television and print advertisements that lead...
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